A fresh start

Day one. New classes, new room, many new friends, a fresh start. I'm ready

Today was a great day. It brought mixed emotions though. I felt so great, but twice I was almost at the point of tears. I'll start with the great things though:

1. Started the morning with a workout. Always great
2. Was asked after work to begin training for another part of joes. I would be doing a lot of the stocking and buying the supply stuff. This is a lot
More responsibility, but a challenge which I always enjoy. Also it was just encouraging o know that they trust me and see potential and that I really am eager to put 100% in to the job.
3. I got a phone call or actually I returned his call an got to talk with nick stapleton for a solid chink of time. It is always encouraging to hear how god is wrking and through him and his ministry. I always leave the discussion blessed and challenged in some way. I am very thankful for him and that we can catch up every once and awhile.
4. Classes were great
5. Made some new friends
6. Go another phone call from a friend just telling me she had been burdened all this week to pray for me and just spent some time encouraing me. It meant a lot just knowing she was thinking and peayig for me. I always love prayer :)
7. And! I was so blessed ot begin a small group with a few girls From the launch team at painted door. We get alig great and it is exactly what I need. God is really working even just relationships with those girls which is so encouraging. Not only that, but we are going to study my favorite topic. How to put the biblical role of women into today's society whether in home church school relationships leadership etc. I am actually doing my research paper on this and am so excited about it. I would love to be doing this exact this 15 years from now. Teaching women what God has called our roles to be in society today. Cuz honestly it isn't right, and this I believe is one of the reasons our society is taking a downward spiral.

Well now the tear jerking moments. Nothing speificalky happened, but God just has been talking to me. He is telling me I need to let go. No pretending, no tryig to fake god out, or half way. I need to surrender completely a few things that I've been holding onto. I am scared I know it will hurt, but ultimately when I give everything over to christ I will be truly satisfied in him. Only he knows the bigger picture the bigger plan, and me wanting the control of this area is holding
me back. For 10 years I held on and gripped tightly even just the glimmer of hope that was instore with it, but god wants all of it, complete and utter surrender to his will. Then in christ alone
My hope will be found. he is my strength.
So this is what I'm learning through the people in my life, circumstances, etc. Oh man it will be hard and it's so scary so hard so painful so everything blah. But god is faithful :) and gracious, and loving, and good, and trustworthy
He is..

I know he is.

Welcome Home

Happy Birthday Dad (first and foremost!)
He is 59 this very day and heading off to India for the next two weeks.  Honestly, I'm a bit nervous and I am not normally that way.  Pray for him if you read this... just a short prayer for safety :)! Thanks

Well, I'm back and ready to kick off the new semester.  I'm beginning with a new mindset and a bit more of experience.  I feel refreshed and very ready for a new semester of learning and growth in many aspects of my life.

Last night was super encouraging. I had Chipotle to set the tone, but then was able to catch up a bit with Morgan Sutter a friend from Costa Rica that just transferred here and then hang out with some friends watching the Cowboys game during which I spent my time getting caught up on some important events that took place in the life of a friend.  It was just great!

I got trained on the new Joes equipment and took 7 espresso shots. ah. Yea i paid for that at 3am this morning when i couldn't sleep.  But overall, such a fun night.  After the game we raided 7/11 for slurpies. I didn't get one, but the results were similar to my 7 shot high. haha Lots of funny statements and sadly most surrounded by twitter (horrible).

Then today I went to a strategy meeting for the Painted Door and out to lunch with Denise and Ro which as always was fantastic.  Honestly, it was just such a blessing to come back to and be apart of for the first couple days back in Chicago.

And I have a room set up and settled in just the way I want.  Yea there is a few missing pieces here and there, but its great to have my own bed and what not.  I am so very thankful. 

So tomorrow the cycle begins.  New classes, new people, new goals, new projects, the whole kit and caboodle.  To go along with that, a new lifestyle. I'm beginning to start up my working out routine and healthy eating too like what I had in Costa Rica.  Honoring God with my body.  Not that I haven't been in the past, but let's just say I slacked a bit during break, so I'm ready for a jump start in that area.
Well, its an early morning for me and devotions are still needing to be done!

Goodnight!

Moody Semester 2

Ready or not, here it comes.

In just 48+ hours I will be hittin the sack, preparing myself for another bright start to a new semester at Moody Bible Institute.  As I pack up the clothes and things at home and prepare to head back to school, I begin to think of the things that happened this past semester: the blessings, the temptations, the discouragement, the fun, etc.  Before I begin this next semester I wanted to spend a moment highlighting a few of the moments at Moody thus far.

Moment #1: Move-in day

     *I learned I would be tripled with two people I was so excited to live with! The excitement was high. Here I was at the place I never dreamed I would be.  Ready and eager for the adventure to begin, not knowing what exactly to expect.

Moment #2: FYT bonding

     *Our cohort was crazy close and fun! From the retreat, to fun classtime discussions, we really connected and were able to really bond throughout the semester even creating our own lunch table :)! It willl be sad not having most of my classes with all those great people!

Moment #3: Cubs game

      *Free cubs tickets that I got to go with Nick Stapleton and mi padre.  Enough said! It was great!

Moment #4: Bed Bugs #1,2,& 3

       *One of the many challenges this past semester was never being settled.  I started out in a room with MJ and Kristin on 7N, but a month in was moved to Jenkins with Kristin because of bed bugs.  After about a month there I moved back into my room for a week, but sure enough got them again.  I was finally moved to 8N with a girl named Nikki.  It was stressful having to wash all my clothes over and over.  Honestly, I wanted to be settled, but I never felt that way.  I didn't have a bed that was really *my bed*.  It kept me relying on the Lord for my strength let's put it that way.

Moment #5: Joes

      *I knew going into school I needed a job.  Luckily early on I found a small catering job, that well wasn't super enjoyable, but was a job.  About 2 months into the semester I was called over to Joes by a girl I had met during the summer briefly named Haley.  She told me that they were needing a person to fill a spot at Joes coffee and asked me to fill out an application.  The next day I had an interview and the following MOnday I began training.  What an absolute blessing!! God's grace was so evident! That job really got me through some tough stuff that went on during the semester.  I love going to work and am looking forward to beginning again next week :)!

There have been many defining great and not-so-great moments, but I know for sure this is where God wants me.  I am learning and constantly being challenged to figure out who I am and who God has called me to be.  Each day he gives me new opportunities to choose him over my selfishness and over the temptations of the world.  Moody is such a humbling place.  I have always been the leader, always been the "spiritual" one, the ministry girl, but at Moody everyone is.  It isn't about making a name for yourself.  It isn't about standing out.
It is not about being somebody, but knowing somebody. 

So now, I am beginning again.  What do I want to do differently? How will this semester look different than the last?

     *Listen: w/o selfish intentions, w/o preparing what I will say after they finish, w/o interrupting, w/o distraction Proverbs 12:15 "Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others" 

     *Praise: for it is through magnifying God's glory that our joy is made complete.  In anything and everything I do, may I seek to praise God. Psalm 86:12 "I will praise thee, O Lord my God, with my whole heart; and i will glorify your name forevermore"

    *Fear Him: Tremble at his word.  Fear the Lord.  This is the beginning of all wisdom. Live not for the fear of man, but of God in whom all things were created. Isaiah 66:2 "My hands have made both heaven and earth; they and everything in them are mine. I, the Lord, have spoken! I will bless those who have humble and contrite hearts, who tremble at my Word" 

There are so many more things that I need to work on, but these three are a few of the big ones I see a need for in my life at this point.  Not sure what God has planned for this semester, but I know it will be different.  Last semester I went in to it for me, but its not about me.  It's about him, all about him.  My worth and happiness aren't built upon the knowledge I have, the people I know, the name I make for myself, or the classes I take.  It is rooted and grounded in the Lord who will never leave nor forsake me.

Gracias Dios

por lo que soy,

por la mujer que me has creado ser

por la universidad donde tengo la oportunidad aprender y crecer en mi conocimiento de tu

tu eres mi padre,

mi amor,

mi esperanza

solo tu dios, solo tu puedes ofrecerme una esperanza.

solo tu me das satissfaccion

te doy mi vida,

te doy mis planes,

mis aspiraciones,

mis debilidades

conformame a su imagen,

preparame para la calle que voy a caminar,

dame paciencia

te confio y

te amo

Passion Recap

Wow! What an encouraging week. The grace of God is so much over my life.  Even just the opportunity to go to such a conference is what I like to think of as a "God-thing".  I was not planning to head to Atlantaa week before, but God knew that I really needed this awakening.  Each message, each worship spoke righ to a particular situation and need in my heart.
Not only was it a huge blessing to be around 22000 students pursuing and worshipping Christ, but I also was able to connect with a few Moody students I didn't know before and really get to know them a bit better.  This was an answer to prayer as well.
From Beth Moore, to Louis Giglio, John Piper, Francis Chan, and Andy Stanley, the week was jam packed of incredible preachers.  Then to boot we had Hillsong United, David Crowder, Matt Redman, Christy Gnockels, Chris Tomlin, Fee to provide us with amazing worship.  Each day was so inspiritng.  Watching 22000 Students raising their hands, falling on their knees, lifting up their hearts to the Lord it took my breath away.

Each message, prepared and given completely uniquely, spoke directly to me.
Beth Moore captivated me with her message on the will of God and how God prepares, adjusts us, and fills us to equip us for our highest calling.
Some points that really stuck out to me were:
"If God saw things and situations in our lives weren't beneficial, he would have said NO"
"He puts us in situations where we don't fit.  It doesn't mean we aren't supposed to be there, it means he wants to adjust us.  He wants us to love those we don't like."
"Until you are in a situation with people who bring out the worst in you, God can't bring out the best in us"
"If we don't allow him to repair us we will not live out who God prepared us to be"
"Whatever God has called you to do/be, you can't do it.  Only Jesus Christ can do.  He may challenge you to rise up in his name to do the impossible"
"Quit try to run in someone else's lane, odn't compare yourself.  Your plan is different than someone' else's"
"Let Christ restore you"

Francis Chan challenged me to Fear the Lord, have reverance for the Word of God.  Ultimately if I feared God fully, no temptation would be too difficult.  Without Scripture taken at its highest reverance we have a distorted view of who God is.
Some key things said:
"Stop believing you are the less loved kid.  It isn't about you, but about God's grace"
"His divine power has granted us life and godliness.  If you aren't living that way..whose fault is it?"
"I am not just a human being, flesh and blood, but his Spirit is in me.  I am a partaker of divine nature"
"know  you have a divine nature, utilize this power and recalculate your steps toward sin"

Why is it so hard to accept that God loves you?
What is God calling you to cahnge in your life right now?

Andy Stanley gave a practical message that I am goign to spend my next semester digging deeper into and trying to implement into my life.  He kept repeating the phrase "Its always a mistake to determine what you want to do before you determine who you want to be"
His main points were:
"You talents have the potential to make a name for you, but your character is what you are defined by"
"For the rest of your life there will be pressure asking you what you want to do, not who you want to be"
"The traits that you choose to define you form a perimeter around your actions"
"You WILL become something"
"Purity paves the way to intimacy"
"Generousity assures that the things you own, will never own you"

John Piper is a deep guy.  I have listened to him before and really have to analyze what he says after I listen to him because he goes fast for the concepts he digs into.  Overall though, his message hit deep by asking the question is Jesus an ego maniac?  Why do we praise a God that demands us to praise him?  Why is he allowed to be a jealous God?
Some of his thoughts included:
"Not only do you live for God's glory, but God lives for God's glory"
"Do we love for God to magnify his glory or is our godcenteredness a cloak for our own self-centeredness"
"eternity past...eternity future...CROSS"
"the apex of the pursuit of his glory is joy"
"Praises not only express, but also complete our enjoyment"
"Where God says praise me, He wants us to come to the fulfillment of our joy"
"Ever notice the best moments make you feel insignificant"
"You weren't made to be somebody, but to know somebody"
"The cross is a combo of joy and grace"
"Jesus was crucified to show God's righteousness and because in his divine forebearance he passed over our sins"
"When he passes over our sis it makes it look like he doesn't value his glory/ but he does and thats why he died"
"the Cross vindicated his glory"
"the foundation of our salvation is not our worth, but on God's infinite value"
"he is  the 1 being in the universe where self-exaltation is not an act of a needy ego, but a self-giving for our enjoyment and satisfaction"

Louis Giglio rocked my world the last day.  He took a passage that really confused me and put a spin on it that cleared things up and put it in perspective.  He used an analogy that showed us how often we try to make our salvation based on works and our promises to God that we would change.  Instead he told us to surrender to Christ to let him work in us. He also points out some of the goals of Passion 2010 as we left.
He shared:
"Passion 2010 desires not an emotional turn around, but a theological one"
"It doesn't matter as much when you became a christian, but are you a christian and are you choosing to follow him Now"
"Allow/let God worki n you to work it out.  Let grace take precedent"
"God works in you to will and act"
"I can't but you can"
"You ahve to work in me, trusting you to supply the power to work out my salvation"

Each message intertwined.  I left, theologically challenged for the upcoming year with new perspectives and new desire and motivation for praising God.  I want it to be about him.  I want to fear God and glorify him in all i do.

Passion

Well, The past 2 days we were driving to passion conference in Atlanta, Georgia. I'm with my sister her husband and a few of their staff. Right now there is 21000 students from all over the world gathered together to bring
Glory to the Lord. What an incredible experience to be apart of! So many college campuses represented. I am just praying thst God would awaken my heart. Part of me feels like Satan knows the vision God gave me and since then is doing anything in his power to hold me back from drawing near. I just feel farther than I have in such a long time. I pray, read my Bible, have fellowship, but still there is a dryness that I can't seem to get past. I am praying that personal revival comes here. That I choose to fear God not man and let God love me by releasing the reigns in controlling my life. I only give God what I want to give or what is easy. Tonight was great though. I got to meet up with Roo hedges and a few of her friends who were here. That was great to connect with them!
Tonight we got to hear Louis giglio talk on John 11-12 and awakening. We also heard chris Tomlin, and Christy gnockels. You would think Atlanta would be warm considering it's the south but nope it's freezing, sooooo cold. Bedtime



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